I have been trying to find things to write about me and the world around me. Sometimes it is so hard, I read and read while the writers block plagues me. So that is why some posts after a bit shorter than others. I was reading today about the 10 myths of living a trans person. Written by a person who did not really get it or understand that to lump one group of people together process nothing except that they are a group of people.
So I looked at what are the myths about me…… (spoiler alert) the following might shock and lead you to knowing more about me.
1. I’m gay…..<<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>> Well let’s have some fun and mind twisting conversation about the subject of being trans vs. gay. So ever since I can recall I’ve felt like this. I have found men attractive, but not in a way that would make me wish to have them in bed with me. Now when it comes to women that is another story altogether different. I have been married the times to women. Now as a man attracted to women that is called heterosexism. But I’m not a man or a woman, I’m trans. So taking out the term heterosexism cause I cannot fill that role in any means or fashion. In one world I could be gay or lesbian. Cause I’m attracted to women in the way shape and form. So am I gay or lesbian, well I’m just attracted to whom I’m attracted to nothing more, for me that happens to be women.
2. I have a mental disorder. <<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>>Wow even though the DSM V remains clear that being trans is a disorder where the body and mind do not coincide. This part is true, yes I have always felt disconnected in one form or another. As far as I know the only real problem that I’m aware of that I have had is that I have had depression in the past. Lucky for me i sought treatment, and got rid of an abuser in my life.
3. I’m selfish to the point I’m a narcissist<<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>>….. I am a passionate parent and advocate for your children and that at times can come across as purely selfish. But its my childrens best interests I have heart at all times and mind after the theirs. I am a single person at the moment and the entire time of my separation over the past 13months. Time is what we need. Adjusting to the changes I am going through. Letting my children adjust and accept my changes as well as our family dynamics and they have been ever so accepting and loving and adjusted better than I ever thought possible. Being my authentic self can be lonely at times as I’ve mentioned in other blogs, but its better than making short term or bad decisions or decisions that would unsettle my children. No matter my doubts when alone in my bed. I am confident the right partner will come along for us in time with love and without compromise.
4. You have been seen in men’s clothes… I still have a bit of a laugh over that line. I’m very happy in my clothes, they happen be be very nice clothes some come in size 14-18. Wait why are the numbers so low? Well it is simple, i shop in the women’s section, men’s numbers tends to be higher. Maybe it is due to the fact that I wear colors now and that might be confusing to others. Wow the style of clothes are noises have not really known to be in men’s areas. In short to be clear I don’t buy or wear men’s clothing.
5. You’re confused about your gender….<<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>> Wow for once in my life, the noises in my life have stopped. What I’m saying is once the testosterone left my body as I started the HRT program. The issues feeling like I could not stand looking in the mirror have been over. I no longer feel a sense of loss every waking day. Yes I know if legal dickheads read this they might try to use it against me. If the truth be told until you walk in the shoes that I wear don’t assume you can understand that feeling, in fact I don’t this there is a way to help you understand.
6. Your confusing your children. <<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>>While being honest, to some confusion was merely physical. Though if at the core they knew that i have always been there for them and that they always came first in my life, this has not changed. The confusion lies only with the issue of the terms with mum and dad. Such minor issues of labels, are over come with love and understanding. So with time all minor issues are lost and forgotten. I have never heard anyone call my could rats, horrible, bad mannered, broken, not cared for and anything like that. Cause I’m an active parent.
7. I’m going to hell…<<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>> I love this myth, when you find anything in any religious text let me know. Cause I’m Christian and I’ve not found one line about it.
8. I’m militant…<<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>>. Well being an overall asshole have never been my desire in life. However being as good, caring, living and giving person has been my goal. I have all I had before I could give no more and we’re left. I stood even when I knew all hope was lost. I defended when others accused. So I stood by my motto say what you mean, mean what you say. One does not need to act like an army to prove a point. So here I stand, I’m happy to be trans, if you don’t like it that is fine. I have no choice to like it or not, but I will not shove it down your throat. Though I do ask please let me have the same rights that you enjoy without question.
9. I’m uneducated well get to know me and you will find out. <<<<MYTH….THE TRUTH>>>That I’m smarter than the average bear. I have learned from higher education, real life and the school of hard knocks. I will go toe to toe on subjects that I have as clear understanding. I’m also willing to admit when I’m wrong or have made a mistake.
Well I think that most of these stupid rumors that have been said about me have been addressed. Hope you have a great night. Be kind to one another.