I should know better…

I have huge respect for PFLAG. I was up writing and reading when this came across my news feed from them. Link 

Needless to say, it pissed me off a bit. So I wrote a response, a little on the long side but someone needed to speak out.

“O.M…… What irresponsible rubbish did Transforming Tasmania spewed out of their spokesperson’s mouth. “No doctor can say whether you are or are not trans.” – WRONG period. There is a reason for the WPATH guidelines. They are in place not only to protect the Patient but the doctors as well. There are medical conditions that mimic Gender Dysphoria. Without proper care and diagnosis mistakes could happen. Some parts of Transition cannot be reversed. Counseling is 100% necessary we all carry baggage. Transition is not a walk in the park and one day you wake up and say holy (beep) it all makes sense lets get it chopped off or added on. 
“Trans people are who we say we are and we shouldn’t be having to prove that.” Yeah, I am sorry but you do need to prove it. Getting treated for the wrong health condition is like having your foot chopped off when all you had was a headache. The WPATH guidelines protect us in more than one way.
“The intent of this bill is to move away from language that medicalises being trans,” Why in the heck would you want to do this. It has taken years for the health professionals to get to a point where we are being Treated correctly. Moving away from medicalizing the Transgender condition in any form, will do no one any good. Then they change the story that being Trans is not a health issue but a myth. 
Next, it is this type of careless rhetoric that is placing us in harm’s way. The media and certain groups have spun this crap in a light that makes us look bad. Which by some right is True, we do look like morons when we push for changes in laws that should be governed at the Federal level. Then those laws also do not hold True to the intent of WPATH guidelines. Yes if a child is born Intersexed then a birth certificate should state that and not Male or Female. But to go blank or opt out is a statistical nightmare. There are conditions that are being tracked for birth defects when babies are born using the standard two markers. Take that out and have no plan to adjust for the overall change, chaos. Then you also have issues that some of these numbers and conditions are being tracked worldwide. 
Last and in close to my point if you want to allow people to see the Trans community in a more favorable light. We should have proposed a more simplified approach to changing the Birth Certificate for the Trans community. I think what Rosemary Armitage has proposed is on that level. We who are Transgender and are going through Transition already have two doctors stating this type of information. So why make a big stink about it.”

Thought I would post this here as well.

The painful truth…

Being Trans is not easy, I love it when people tell me they admire and are encouraged by my story and life. The hard cold reality of being Trans is one that is Alone and sometimes Unemployed.

The Alone part I am dealing with that. Most of that is my fault. I was hurt so bad in the last relationship that I am still very scared about meeting people. But I keep trying yeah I don’t want to be single but then we add in the fear factor and I retreat back to my safe place. I even think that who would want this damaged package, so then I retreat back into my safe place.

Unemployment is a nightmare, to say the least. It is something many people don’t think about when they think about the Trans community. But it is a cold and hard reality. In some places like the US, Transwomen are forced to turn to prostitution (which is against the law in 49 states). They do this just to survive. It comes with HUGE risks factors and does not make for a fulfilled life.

But I live in Australia and things are different here thankfully. But I am still faced with the reality of being unemployed. I look at all the jobs I have applied for and all the knock backs I receive. I meet with a person who is to help me with finding a job twice a month. Who about a week ago wanted to introduce me to her boss. Who in less than 15 minutes told me that “my depression would get better when I got a job” then discounted what I had to say about finding a job as a Transwoman. I was so pissed steam was coming off of my head. In three years I have applied for over 300 jobs. So when people tell me it is not hard to find work I so want to copy and paste them my seek applied for a section of that account. I stopped collecting all the letters of rejection it was getting depressing.

I have ideas for a business but that also fell a bit flat. But that is okay I was dealing with my depression issue over the holidays and came to the point that I needed to dive back into writing. I also started to look at using Patreon to support my efforts.

My thoughts are to set up a Patreon site and link it to this blog. But as a benefit for those who are willing to support these efforts. I will make on the Patreon side a chapter per week as I write some of my books. Mind you I have 8 books that are not finished so there will be many different things to read. I would love your feedback on this idea and what you would be willing to contribute to the upkeep of the blog and be able to read my books as I write them.

Have a wonderful day.

Thank you

~Ally

Blight update

As I have said in the past that I am working on a book with a few other people. This book is a Table Top Roleplaying game. Yup years of gaming passion now to be put to use. We are going to be entering the playtest Alpha 5.0 on Feb the 26th. Which I hope by the end of March will see us reach our goal of Beta Playtest 1.0. Which will see us into our Second quarter with our Kickstarter part of the project. We hope to see some funds to begin coming in for the Artwork, Layout, and Editors in the third quarter. The fourth Quarter we are hoping that everything will be ready for the copyright check. With the release of Blight in 2020.

I am not going to give you too many clues as to what Blight is all about until the start of the Kickstarter campaign. But we are still looking for local Launceston, Tasmania talent as we would like to bring new business to our wonderful city. So keep your eyes open on my page and I will let you know what we are doing.

I am so very excited about this. Have a wonderful day everyone.

Planning

Well as we all know without planning you are planning to fail.

Here I am planning out the surgery part of my Transition. That means,
1) Weight loss
2) Support Network
3) Money (The house will get sold this fucking year!)
4) Attorney & Will
5) Doctor Visits
6) Aftercare
7) Life moving forward
8) Travel (boat or plane) + Bobbie (a trusted friend who does not get grossed out)
9) Pre-teen watcher in case there is a timeline issue.

Shit, there is a lot to do…..

I watched this video this week and it was very helpful in answering a few simple questions that people might have as to what is going to take place.

Well, the weight loss is well underway there is a lot to lose. Sugar and Caffeine are out of the picture. But I am going to go see my doctor to talk over this plan.

The magic of parenting

Despite what some in my blood family might think (I was once told by a family member that I was a horrible parent who should not be one [sic]). I am a good parent that strives always to be a great parent. There are times when I don’t reach this level. But like today the sun will set and Tuesday will be a new day to strive towards my goals as a parent.

Why am I saying this? Well, it started so very simple. Three weeks into the new school year one of my children has lost her lunch box. ARGH!!!!!
It did not make for a very happy parent. So today she is using a bag for lunch, Grrrr. We had the last lunch box for 2 years and this was a treat for the child. I am hoping that they come home with it this afternoon. I won’t hold my breath.

Then in the car, someone said I hate school. Both my Ex and I work hard to stress to all our children how important school is and why we feel this way. My oldest (25) is working towards her masters (so proud). Now in saying that not every child is measured by her. They are however measured by what we feel they can achieve. I work very hard at supporting them in their goals in school. I am also proud of their victories, as well as work with them to overcome their defeats. I look at their events outside of school. There are times where they are not always happy with those but we look at where we started and where we are now. I show them that small failures are but a drop in the ocean of the success that they have built. I even use those words to keep in their minds the visual of an ocean of success.

Okay as I was leaving the school after dropping the youngest children off. I felt so proud of them and their efforts. Yeah, it was a lunch box that might be gone, I hope not because that one was $$. But, if it is might have to look at getting a new one (deep breath). After school, I will sit down with her and talk it out, this time looking at for resolution. Being this time she will need to work it off (chores). Why do this? Well, I am doing this to teach her about money once more. I never sugar coat money and the costs of things. If we cannot afford something I come right out and tell them.

Now as every parent knows this is the magic of parenting. Balancing the good with the bad. Scrapes and Bruises, we press on. Not every day will be good and not every day will be bad. But they are worth every second.

30 DAYS!

Yes! Yes! Yes! I did it……So what do I think about the adventure?

Well, a lot has changed and some changes are very exciting for me. Weight loss, Food Tastes better, Amount of food intake changed, Skin health changed, Urine changed, No longer feeling bloated, Thinking is clearer, The sense of smell has improved, Body odor has reduced, Sleep is better, Bad breath has gone, snoring has reduced, and the list goes on. But I am very happy with the results.

So, where to from here. Well, I am having a cheat day today. But starting tomorrow I am going to start another 30 days. But this time I am going to step it up again. I am going to forgo Caffeine, Fizzy Drinks, and Sugar that is not needed (candies & lollies). But this time I am going to cut out bread so bye bye pizza (yeah I know this is going to be hard, I love pizza). Just so you know for the most part I am not forcing this on to my kids. I am a firm believer that they have a right to a childhood. But I am reducing their intake of Sugars. But bread is still going to be in their diet due to school and sports that they are in.

I am not going to cut out rice and pasta. I am going to reduce the intake for me but not cut out. As the cut out of Caffeine and Sugar was a huge shock to my system. I was not fully ready for the impact of how I would respond to something that I used as a standard staple. So cutting out the Bread might have another shock to my system.

What or how did it affect my HRT (hormones). Well, I was pleased that it did nothing that I could directly be able to point out any changes. But as I write this I am reflecting on my emotional connection to everything around me. HRT has done some amazing things for me.

Did the 30-day challenge help with physical Trans health. Well, I am losing some weight and it is coming from my midsection (standard women’s waistline) and my thighs. This is nice and makes me feel like I would like to continue this challenge. No boob shrinkage, lol. I am also losing some fat in my face as well. I will know more when my new driver’s license arrives, lol. I hate photos!

In conclusion, DO IT! See what it does for you. Keep a journal on all of it and share it. You don’t have to share it all as I am keeping my weight and the loss to myself. Some things are private and when I reach my goal I will let everyone know what took place. Look it is only 30-days, one month of your life. What if you feel like I do right now? I am going to do it again…

Have a wonderful day ❤

Why do I write? (A new reader question.

Well, gee it started on this blog in 2015 when the world started to come to what I would like to call the eventual end. If you did not know I am still married to someone to whom I do not wish to be. The events that lead to this are many and some do not shine kindly on that person. So, I will avoid bringing that into this post. I must say at one time I thought that we both loved each other. People change and with that comes the reality that you might not be in love with that person.

As I was saying, I was needing a way to express my ideas and a friend of mine suggested I start to write. I have always dreamed of writing, but being highly Dyslexic I shied away from the idea that anyone would want to read my posts. I expressed this to my long friend. She told me that I had always been a big risk taker why should I stop now. That is when I hit me I had stopped taking risks. Somewhere I allowed a person to neuter my personality. I was trying to write a book in 2007 but a person that I thought I could trust told me I was not a writer and that no one would ever read my stories.

We warn parents not to do this to there children. But little do people know that it has the very same effect on adults as well. I had a great start to a fiction piece and with the right backing, it could have become something special. But I listened to a voice that cut me very deep and I shelved it away and in time it was lost. When I wrote my first book I was so shocked that I did it. I did not know at the time it is not always going to be easy to write stories. I also did not know that you can dig too deep on stories and find Monsters hidden in peoples closets. I like writing non-fiction, the reality of life is more than a connection to others. It is a magical thread that binds to all of us. We find that with real stories it is harder to hate the person behind the face when we know it.

I was finding also when I wrote on something I was releasing a pressure that was building up inside of me. A magical connection that at this time I am still short for words on how it makes me feel to do it. But like an addiction, it is something that needs to be done. I enjoy it I love the power and the magic of every word. So that is why I write….

Have a wonderful day and do something magical.